Time for a Grammar Lesson

Owl: "What a scene! A octopus got me!"

Bug: "Phoo! ain’t no octopus is got him!"

Pogo: "Mebbe he mean a octopus did got him."

Bug: "A octopus did got him?  Is that grammatiwackle?"

Pogo; "As grammacklewak as rain — ‘is got’  is the present aloofable tense an’ ‘did got’ is the part particuticle."

Bug: "Mighty strange! My teachers allus learnt me that the past inconquerable tense had a li’l’ more body to it."

Owl: "Octopockles got me!"

Bug: "There he go makin’ those ungrammatipickle outcries an incries– who but a  iggerant uncouth type boor could unnderstand such slovenlike English?"
"’Course what he ought to holler is Octopatamus is got me!"

Pogo: "He could of hollered Octopots did got me!"

Bug: "That’d be more the past invokable tense–only for use ‘gainst elephant an’ other dry type game."

Pogo: "True."
"I’d use the present indictible tense more like this —Rhinockwursts done is got me!"

Bug: "The future provokable would be better–more like Hippolollipops is gone–"

Turtle: "What in the world is you two doin’?"

Pogo: "We was figgerin’ out what was the proper tense — "Ooh, a octopus is got me’ or ‘Ooh, a octopus done got me!’"

Turtle: "Easy. I would of hollered — uh — uh– um –A octopus done got Albert!"

Pogo: "Well, that would be safer — or more generous. I can’t figger which."

Bug: "But still ungrammathematical."
                                                                                             Walt Kelly Octopossible


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